May Contest Theme: Reunions
The Student Choice Contest mailbox is now OPEN Click here.
Congratulations to Laura Loomis of Pittsburg, CA., winner of our April student choice contest.
INCRIMINATING PHOTOS
I could have avoided all that trouble, if only I had remembered to pay my blackmailer on time.
Normally I write the check with the rest of my monthly bills, so my husband, Worthington Tolliver IV, doesn’t see the photos of me with the 26-year-old tennis instructor. But I got distracted last month as I was writing checks to the Ladies’ Follicle Society (which provides wigs to needy children with bad haircuts), and to my plastic surgeon, Dr. Barnabas, who put this lovely slope on my nose. I got to daydreaming about last week’s tryst in the pool house with my young man, and then Worthy came in looking for his favorite golf clubs, and I stuffed the check into the envelope for the other blackmailer, the one who’s been threatening to expose our illegal stock trades. You’d think that the stock-trade blackmailer could have sent a refund or something; did he think I was tipping him for good service?